Brett 'n Blasey Ballad

 In the broad tradition of American folk music, I borrowed an old story melody from Mamas and Papas for this ditty about what happened when Kavanaugh got nominated, back in summer of '18, for the Supreme Court.

            Have a listen:  Ballad of Brett 'n Blasey

Lindsey and Mitchey were gett'n' kinda itchy

just to leave  Judiciary hearings behind.

Chuck with his committee, workin’ toward a ditty

trying to get Brett’s nomination on time.

On committee fence Jeff Flake sat

‘cause victims’ rantings knocked him flat.

Lindsey and Mitchey still a-pushin’ forward

in the Senate, you know where that’s at

and no one’s getting Tweet ‘xept Blasey Ford

 

Lindsey said to Grassley we need to go so fastly

just to push this nomination on through (let’s go fast)

But Flake said to Grassley, we just can't pass it

until we truly know what to do.

On committe fence Jeff Flake sat

‘cause elevator tirades knocked him flat.

Lindsey and Mitchey still a pushin’ forward

in the Senate, you know where that’s at

and no one’s getting Tweet ‘xept Blasey Ford.

 

When Blasey was in high school, accosted by a drunk fool. . .

She said it was the nominee.

In Committee testifyin’, implied the nominee be lyin’

And stop his nomination immediately.

Cuz he was drunk’n crazy, back in the school days,

she said Brett had accosted in a drunken haze.

Lindsey and Mitchey still a pushin’ forward

in the Senate, you know where that’s at.

and no one’s getting Tweet ‘xept Blasey Ford.

 

Old schools, Senate rules, smart fools, America drools,

the escalating hype is so strong.

Tweet up, Face up, everything is hype up

to make trauma and drama prolong.

In a last-minute surprise

 Jeff proposed a compromise

Lindsey and Mitchey still a pushin’ forward

in the Senate, you know where that’s at.

and no one’s getting Tweet ‘xept Blasey Ford.

 

Broke busted Blasey can’t be trusted

and Mitchey wants it to go to the Floor.

Diane cant take it; she says she’ll have to shake it

We knew she’d wanna shut that door.

Slidin’ on procedures and rules;

You know its lowball, but politics is old-school.

Blasey’s ‘criminations and sad accusations

cant go on indefinitely,

so Brett’s nomination was becoming a reality.

Glass half-Full